Everyday little things...

Morbid thoughts warning....


Found out yesterday that yet another of my mom's first cousins has died. It seems there has been alot of that lately. Two of my Great Aunt Dee Dee's sons have died in a relativly short period of time. This time was Charles, now i cannot really say I knew him, but i knew of him, i remember meeting one of his brothers a few times (normally when he came to ask mom for money for drugs or a place to hide out from who ever was looking for him) but Charles i did not know. I have been feeling older a bit lately, alot in part to loosing people in my family, the family I had growing up seems to be gone, this christmas if i do not make it to CA will be me and Josh, and possibly Robert if he is still here, Andrew will be with his dad and Sister and Rae will be in FL, Grandma i am not sure what her plans are and the rest i am not sure, I assume Dad and Lori will be with her family. But as a kid we had these HUGE celbrations mounds and mounds of presents, we sang christmas carols with my uncle playing the piano and Grandpa playing the accordian, all kinds of family there, then i was lucky because i got a more sedate but just as exciting christmas morning with my dad, grandparents and various others would stop by... Now it seems everyone is gone, more are going all the time, and i am the one saying in the good ol days. I am only 10 years younger then my mom when she died. Hard for me to believe.


time for an early bed i think....